Help me, PLEASE!

I've always been told that if you don't learn history, you're destined to repeat it.

History has been repeated for a long time. As my twin likes to say: it practically stutters. We continue to suffer the consequences of not learning our history but everyone still refuses to pick up a book. Many prefer to take the easy route and do as they are told or follow whatever example has been set before them. Although they have sometimes witnessed first-hand ill effects, they allow themselves to fall into the cycle. The cycle of being a monkey that watches what others do.

If all the people we cherish and look up to are ones that refuse to be like their peers, then why do so many accept the "norm" or what they have been trained to think. Why do so many choose to be a mirror?

I write this blog out of frustration of what I witness every time I choose to leave my house. There are hundreds of people wearing the same thing, doing the same thing, and acting the same way. What gives? Whatever happened to originality? Whatever happened to being willing to stand out for the sake of your own personal happiness? Is everyone just so afraid of the opinions of their peers that they'd rather be a clone? Someone PLEASE tell me what memo I didn't not receive; this is something I just don't understand.


I think I missed
the day when it was
decided that being like
everyone one else was
cool.
Or am I just so beyond
people have yet to catch up?
CGK: [[Barbie]]

Taming of the Beast

This is a series of poems I wrote that I've finally decided to feature them all at once. Enjoy!!


Part I:
You’re supposed to be the bad one
throwing girls away left and right
I’ve been told to stay away from you,
lucky if I even get half a night
of your attention
forget affection
because a relationship
is nowhere near the direction
you’re traveling
because your tunnel-vision
is tunneled in on my ass
and hers
and hers
and hers.
Allegedly, you’re deeply lodged in your mission-
giving midnight
pleasures and morning sorrow
living for the moment
always gone before the light of the morrow.
So if that’s how it is
and what I’ve been hearing true
what happened to my indefinite sorrow
I don’t feel cheap and used…
It’s been a month. According to your
track record we shouldn’t still be talking
right now I should be cursing your
existence, hoping you trip and fall
on a pointy rock, never to hurt me again
but I’m not. And I’m wondering why.
Am I the girl that’s gonna break the cycle?
Make the news exposing you as a guy
that actually has a heart?
Do I really want to take that chance?
Take a risk; make a leap into the unknown,
all for the sake of romance?
A romance that probably
only exists in my head
slowly seeping into my heart soon to take over…
This is what I think about in my bed
when I’m alone and you’re not
holding me,
your heartbeat against my back
whispering, “Please don’t fuck over me”.
But aren’t you the one that’s more
likely to do that?
You have me so confused. Debating with my
head and heart
trying to be smart
about the situation
but thoughts of you are slowly consuming me
no matter how high I keep my guard
you jump over it
probably because you’re so damn tall
and my guard can only go so high
so I guess that means its time to let it fall
take you in and give you a chance
cuz I’ve given chances to too many guys
that think they too fly
leaving me high and dry
and their “playa status” wasn’t
as half as yours, in the least.
So maybe it’s time for me
to tame the wild beast.
*whip sound*
Are you ready?




Part II:
Forget taming the wild beast
I think I’m just gonna hit you for the sake of it.
Because sadly you’re proving to be the way
I was told you are.
I guess I was smart in not giving you
A taste of the sweetness you desired that night.
But it doesn’t make me feel any better
Because I still feel played.
Although you don’t know it
And no one ever will
I was ready to give you my heart
All of it. No questions asked
But now you have me double-guessing
Double-thinking my steps.
Cuz sweet words are one thing but actions tell it all
And from you recent lack thereof
It’s really quiet in here.
And that silence is only fueling my anger.
So my guard is back up.
MUCH higher than before and maybe you’ll be able to jump it
Maybe not.




Part III:
Love is one of those games
I don’t think I’ll ever be able to win
Thought I could tame the beast within you,
But ended up wearing myself out.
And I’m tired of chasing you around this monopoly
Board, apologizing for things that aren’t my fault
So I believe its time for me to take off my gloves
And call it a day.
I don’t think I can take any more of your
Advanced tricks
Especially when I haven’t been taught
The rules of the game.
So for the first time in life,
I think I will forfeit. And accept my fate
As one without love.